I’ve been worrying a bit lately about leaving Mr Toad on his own for so long, while I’m at work. I think he’s lonely, and he spends far too much time watching trashy TV –

So when I saw the advertisement, I just couldn’t resist …

And so far it seems to be a success; Mr Toad and Dave the Date have really bonded and love spending time together –

And I have discovered that a date really is the perfect pet. They don’t need walking, grooming or feeding, and if they should happen to suffer an unfortunate accident …

Then Dave the Second (Third, Fourth, Fifth etc …) is there in the fridge ready to step up and take his place

And, just like a child with a replacement goldfish, Mr Toad is none the wiser.