New England is such a tasteful, refined place that it’s very difficult to be trashy there – but somehow I managed it.
New England is full of picturesque clapboard houses with white picket fences and immaculate front gardens. There’s a real respect for history, and there are all sorts of beautiful old hotels called things like The Hampton Inn, Frederick William House, Falmouth Tides – all names that evoke solid tradition and decency. But somehow I ended up staying at Margaritaville, which had a giant flip flop in reception, light fittings made from cocktail glasses and life-affirming quotes everywhere.
The flip flop, tastefully fronted with a lobster and a ring pull, was sculpted in 2024 by an artist who chose to remain anonymous … I think I have some idea why. However the artist is also, according to the hotel write up, widely acclaimed – but by whom, it doesn’t say.
Now, it might be because I’m a curmudgeonly old crone, but I have a particular dislike of life-affirming quotations and I tend to react with anything from an eye roll to a snarl, depending on how twee they are. If I see Live, Laugh, Love written on a cushion, a pebble or a heart-shaped ceramic keepsake, I immediately want to smash it, slash it or chuck it in the nearest river. Does anyone ever forget to live or laugh or love, because they don’t have a cushion to remind them? And don’t even start me off on affirmations written on surf boards …
What does this even mean? Keep repeating bits of it over and over again? Make sure you fade away at the end? I’ve no idea, but it was counterproductive in my case, because it irritated the life out of me every time I saw it.
Trashy episode number two involved a fizzy drink called Moxie, which is the official state drink of Maine. I wonder if all the states have an official drink. I hope so – it’s much more original than a bird or flower.
I got the impression that Moxie is New England’s Mountain Dew; a reminder of childhood and a guilty pleasure that everyone now realises is extremely bad for you.
It’s flavoured with gentian root, which gives it a unique bitter flavour and aftertaste. According to our guide it’s a Marmite drink (although he didn’t actually say that because he’s American and has never heard of Marmite) and it divides opinion strongly. But everyone I spoke to in the supermarket where we bought our supplies said they loved it.
Moxie isn’t too trashy on its own, but it can be mixed with coffee-flavoured brandy to make a cocktail called Trailer Park. So, after we’d stocked up on the ingredients, we hung around in the supermarket car park, drinking Trailer Park out of plastic cups … totally trashy and absolutely delicious!